Don’t Say the Word “Sex”


Yesterday was a day of rest for Valerie and I. After two weeks of intense schedule we needed a day to recharge. Today we are at the “Rosterman Retreat Center” for a seminar for 30 pastors and their wives.

When Simeon asked me to sponsor this event I felt an immediate response. During our 36 years of coming to Kenya we have come to understand that pastors in Kenya desperately lack practical teaching in a number of areas. One of those areas is a practical understanding of Marriage and Family. Because of this, many pastor are a very poor example to their congregation of how to show genuine love to their wives and children. This morning Valerie and I had a wonderful time “team-teaching” on the subject of ‘How to Have a Great Marriage’.

Here in Kenya they never, never, never mention the subject of sex. The minute sex is mentioned they all turn their faces and look the other way. They all do it, but they have never heard someone teach it. Way back in 1980, while Valerie and I were living in Kisumu, we hosted the first Marriage Seminar that anyone had ever heard of. They blushed when we talked about affection in a marriage. Some even thought that such teaching was stuff that Americans do because of Hollywood’s influence and that “Affection” between a husband and wife was simply “not Kenyan”.

Well they have come a long way because there are some prominent Kenyan pastors who have shown up in church holding their wives’ hands. My dearest friend, Simeon Obayo, is one of those. They broke out of the Kenyan culture a number of years ago. He not only shows affection for his wife, but he honors her regularly from the podium. At this point there is a great deal of love in the Kakamega Church, but now it needs to reach the rural areas. That is why we are here preaching the gospel of “Love in a Marriage”.

Again I want to thank those of you who felt a response to help us finance this event. Within a few days we raised $3000 of the $5000 needed to host this 3-day retreat. I am fully confident the Lord will take care of the rest.

Please pray for Valerie! We had her tested today for malaria and typhoid. I thank the Lord that she has neither of those, but she has a very powerful bacterial infection that is going to need some special treatment. The doctor sent a blood sample in for a culture and we’ll know what we are dealing with on Friday. In the meantime “The effectual fervent prayers of righteous people availeth much”.

Hope you had a great Easter.

Love you all
Richard Vicknair